First, stop being angry - that doesn't help her and stresses you out.
You need to find some patience. What will help the most is you doing some practice with her - in doing things in steps. Give her one set of instructions, then two sets, then three -- and see at what type of level she trips up at. For example, have her go to her room, open her second draw and take out a pair of shorts, then close the bathroom door and come back to the kitchen.
Do some orally, then do some simple things on paper.
And, mom, spend the TIME going over homework with her - not to give her answers, but to guide her.
The teacher should also be able to give you specific ideas to help.
One idea is to have her explain to you - and then print out, directions on how to do something, like a list. For example, how to make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Then the two of you make it according to her directions, and see what she is missing. That will help bring home the point.
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And just for fun, here is a great idea some of us teachers use with our students from time to time - READING DIRECTIONS WELL IS IMPORTANT
TEST: Following Directions
Do not mark on this paper until you have read it through to the end.
1. What is your name? __________________________
2. Which kind of school reward do you prefer: candy or pencil? ______________
3. What is your favorite color? ______________________
4. What color are your eyes? _______________________
5. Do you like to ride a bike? (yes or no) ________
6. What is your favorite meal of all time?
7. Do you have a pet? If so, what is its name? If not, would you like to have one?
8. What is your favorite part of school?
9. What is the best cafeteria food item here?
10. Do you daydream a lot when you should be working?
11. What part of the school day do you like least?
10. Now, go back to numbers 1 and 2, and answer them. Leave the rest of this paper blank. If you followed the directions, come to the front of the room and choose your reward. If you did not follow the directions, too bad. Next time, maybe you will.
(lol - gets them every time!!)