Is my 9 year old ADHD or gifted? Teachers vs Dr.?

Question

My son was tested by a Dr a few years ago and he said my son is gifted but may appear to some to be 'ADHD' because of his active "must learn" nature. Every year I've had to deal with teachers telling me that I should consider medicating my child. I've always told myself that I would not even CONSIDER medicating him unless his grades were poor. The teachers at his school have nicknamed him "Pixi Stick Boy" and ask him every morning "how many Pixi Sticks did you eat this morning before you came to school?" - my son has been labeled as 'ADHD' in the schools but 'gifted' by the Dr. Can a child be gifted ~AND~ ADHD? I'll be the first to admit he is QUITE active and his mouth never stops moving, lol - but is that reason to medicate when he's a straight A student? Just looking for opinons on the matter or experienced parents/teachers/Dr's who have been through it- thanks :)

Answer 1

As a teacher, I can't believe anyone would label your son as a pixie stick boy. That made me mad. Medication is not the answer. When my son was 4, he had the same problem. He was extremely smart and the teacher couldn't keep up with his learning ability, therefore it made him restless. This woman had the ordacity to tell me "he might be autistic". To her surprise, I used to work with autistic kids and I snatched my son out of that school quick as I could. Once I took him to a school who was willing to do extra things with him after surpassing the class, he was a totally different child and they never had a problem with them. He is now an A student in school, and he goes to a class once a week for gifted children.

I am sorry to say, but those teachers are too lazy to come up with work specifically your child. I understand that the classes may be over the qouta, but it is still their job to help ALL kids. I teach part-time at a school, and I can't stand seeing lazy teachers who just want to get through the day and collect a check without real concern for the children. Yes, it is not always easy to be a teacher, but you still have to be responsible to help a child's needs. You might want to look at transferring him or talking to an administrator at his school. You deserves better than some lazy teacher saying medication is the answer to her being too triffling to find a real solution to this problem. Do what you have to do for your son to protect your son's educational needs. Obviously he is focusing enough to make straight A's.....he doesn't sound ADHD to me. They sound like they just want him drugged out to keep him quiet. Now I do believe there are a few cases where kids need medication, but after working in special needs classes, yours definitely doesn't sound like this case. Good luck and please take your Dr's option over theirs!

P.S.- If you haven't done so already, I would look into finding an extra curricular activity for your child to help him challenge himself more. I put my son in sports, and its great for him!

Answer 2

The teachers will always tell you to medicate your child Some schools even get a certain amount of money back each year for the medicated children they have at the school. But anyways, DEFINITLEY DONT medicate your child, especially if he is an A student. My 9 year old has Aspergers Syndrome (which has some characteristics of ADHD, and he is also very talented. His teacher said that it would be nice if they had some gifted classes for him, because he is more advanced than the other students, but has concentrations issues, etc...Anyways, I listened to the teachers and put him on medication. Well, I have never felt so guilty in my life and stressed about it, because that Medication, completely changed him. He was blah, irritable, emotional, etc...Also it gave him tics where he would jerk his head and he had constant eye blinking! It was the most terrible thing. We went through 3 different medications and they ALL did the same thing. I would just sit there and cry because I thought I had ruined my son. Some parents enjoy their kids being like zombies I guess, But It was terrible to me. I have e 6 year old also that makes great grades and is sooooooo active and never ever stops talking. But I would never think of medicating him because of what happened with m7y 9 year old. It is your sons personality and I think active, talkative kids are wonderful:) Dont listen to the teachers please. Some of them just want their jobs to be easier and think medicating the child will help that.. Good Luck with your son..

Answer 3

NO, that is not a reason to medicate. Those teachers should know better than to label too, it does have detrimental effects on a child, they picked a nickname for my son too, though I forgot what was, too long ago. My son was very smart, he even had the audacity to tell his teacher she is only allowed to call him by his name, if it is not his name he will not answer. Smart, eh? (That stuck in memory because he was 6 at the time he said that, and the teacher called to complain about his "behavior")

Teachers are full of it, my other son (who is ADHD) has many problems with his grades, he passes, but barely. Now, Scott, (the smartelic) has straight A's and they all told me he was too, but I already had him tested because his older brother was and the Doc told me he was just smart, slightly OCD, but definitely not ADHD. The point, the teachers are not doctors, so they do not know what they are talking about. Not every child who is hyperactive is ADHD. He is nine, I would expect him to be hyperactive, as many children are. If the Doc says he is not, then show the teachers that you DID have him tested and you will NOT put him on medication for something he does NOT have. That medication can cause serious problems with his brain, even worse if he does not have ADHD.

Answer 4

I believe that we have similar situations. I have a so who is now 9. He is very intelligent always reached milestones early, always been VERY active. Always made straight A's. He started having issues when he was 7 with impulsiveness, hyperactivity, and excessive talking to the point that he would be so hyper that he was out of breath all the time. He also has Tourettes which is the main reason that we decided to put him on medication- to control the tics, but it also helps the symptoms of ADHD. He is by no means a zombie, he is still very smart, He may be put in advanced classes now that he an better control his impulsiveness.

I think that all children are born with special talents as well as limitations we as parents are to nurture the talents and help them to deal with their limitations.

I was shocked to read that your sons teachers call him pixie boy? That is totally unacceptable If the other children pick up on this they could start to treat him very badly. That could ruin his love of learning. I would take action immediately.

I also took my son to three different doctors just to make sure of a correct diagnosis and they all gave him the same thing. Tourettes with ADHD as a co disorder. if you would like to talk further about what your options are with your school you can IM me or e-mail me at [e-mail]

Answer 5

My nine year old son is ADD and we had a lot of problems with his school. We refused at that time to medicate him and instead chose behavior modification techniques. When everything stopped working for him and his grades began to stip we decided that it was best to put him on medicine. The only advise I can give on that part is, if you think the doctor could be wrong, seek another opinion. I got five opinions before I finally admitted something was wrong. There is nothing wrong with having doubts.



No two children are the same. If your doctor told you that your child is not ADD/ADHD, I would be more inclined to beleive him/her than your son's teacher. Teachers don't go to medical school. Anymore there are teachers that would rather have children medicated than to have to deal with their disruputions. This is no way to treat kids.



As far as calling your son "Pixie Stick Boy", I would be furious if someone treated my child this way. I understand that children the age of your son can be cruel and pick on each other but for a grown person that is being paid to teach, protect and nurture our children, that is rediculous. I would have the teacher reported.

Answer 6

Coming from a 2nd year special education teacher I would say that yes, your son can be both gifted and ADHD. Even though the over-active behavior is not bothering you or hindering his grades, it may be disruptive to the other students in his class. Perhaps this is why the teachers at his school have given him this label. I would definitely talk to his teachers to get their perspective. Maybe you could even go into his school and observe his behavior during his classes. The might open your eyes at to what is occurring and school and not necessarily at home.

I hope this helps. I think every student needs an opportunity to learn in their own special way. Good luck to you and your son. I hope you find the answers you are looking for!

Answer 7

We went through this with my younger brother, and with me when i was a child, although no so much (it was the early 90's and medication wasnt pushed as much).



You have to understand that schools are main streamed, the teachers teach an entire class of 20-30 kids all at the same pace. Those who get bored, or cant keep up are just labled as poor learners so that the teacher isnt responsible. And the schools, in and effort to keep the balance, try to medicate these children to ease the teachers troubles.



From 1st grade to 5th grade my brothers teachers, and at times, the principal, tried to get him tested for ADHD, in fact, they made the appointments and called in the school nurse to do some testing without my parents notification.



My parents refused EVERY test and insisted that the school cater to my brother and not the teachers.



The child doesnt have ADHD or any other disorder. He's freaking gifted. He's now 13, home schooled and taking physics and computer programming.... at age thirteen.



I was the same way, teachers insisted I didnt learn well in school, and that I needed medication. But I tested post collegic from 2nd grade through highschool, and graduated early at 16.



Tell that school to stuff it where the sun dont shine.



Iam so sick of schools labling children just because the system is not suited for our children.

Answer 8

It is EXTREMELY inappropriate for the teachers to be saying that type of garbage to your son, you or anyone. You have every right to talk tot the principal and insist that they cease immediately. They are not physicians, and can not make the claim that he is ADHD and are not allowed to label him. You can ask your Dr. to write a note to the teachers discussing his IQ and his high need for stimulation due to his intelligence. I would not ever medicate him! Most parents medicate their ADHD child so that they can slow down and learn with other children. It is to help them perform well at school. Your son already does perform well. He does however, need to lern the limits of the classroom and not disrupt if he is finished but wait quietly or he will be punished like anyone else. I would also enlist the teachers help in offering him some sort of special work to keep him busy while the others finish. My son is also very advanced, and his teacher has found that giving him puzzles (crosswords, wordsearches, etc.) has helped her to keep him busy and keeps his mind stimulated. The teachers need to work with you, not shame you and push you away. You are his advocate- if they will not treat you the way you deserve, explore taking him to another school. Good luck.

Answer 9

Yes, a child can be both gifted and ADHD. Grades are not the only reason to medicate a child. He may be disturbing other students in the class so that they can't learn. He could be doing even better and learning more if he's ADHD and he gets the medication he needs. A child with ADHD is hyper to keep himself awake. The brain is missing a chemical. If you medicate him and he calms down, then the medication is helping him stay awake and he doesn't have to be moving all the time to keep himself awake. If he gets more hyper with meds, then he's not ADHD and the meds are pointless.

Answer 10

I would like to share a bit about myself on this question. When I was in third grade [aged 9] I scored in the top 3 on the state tests. You'd think wow, she must have gone far and everything worked well for her. Well it didn't. I was what they called way back then "hyper" It wasn't that I was hyper, I just had a hard time controlling my mind. Thusly, my grades went down over the years and I ended up dropping out of school.

You know what I needed? Someone like you in my life that cared, I didn't need medication, I needed love and to be taught how to use my mind in a positive way.

My son is the same way, scored top 2 in our state! He's also in the Gifted Music Class. You know why he's like he is? Because he does have people who care. He behaves very well in school but at home? Look out!!! He's just like you described about your child. Last year he had three major problems in school, I mean he got into trouble for three big things.

I don't beleive your child has ADHD. I believe your child is intelligent and is bored and easily stimulated. If one child laughs in class or acts out your son probably does worse. It's just a matter of children feeding off each other.



You may not know this, but many, if not all, children who are "gifted" have this problem. It seems their minds grow far too quickly compared to their emotional and social skills. I just don't think you should medicate the child, I fear that if you do he'd have trouble and may not do as well in school.



I have the same problem as you do and my eldest son was much worse! He is incredibly brillant but he really had a hard time dealing with it so he got himself into a lot of trouble. He's grown up now and on his own but he's still messing up. I'd say give your love to your child but at the same time discipline him. I call it loving with one side while discipling with the other. Just be there for your child...that's the best you can do.

Answer 11

And what kind of school does your child attend where teachers label students so publicly?



I don't know if you son is gifted or not, but that type of treatment will put him on bad behaviour for a few years if it is not stopped. What kind of world is it today where people have to act out everything?



And you are paying for this! Take him to a good child specialist; a pediatrcian, and see what is said. Take him to another for a second opinion. If they match, the doctors are probably correct in diagnosis. Most of them are by far.



Then deal with the outcome as appropriate. But never allow grown ups to call your child anything!

Answer 12

You say he was "tested" - but that is at the crux of the matter. For him to be diagnosed properly, he would have to have a brain scan, blood analysis, etc. by specialists, as well as specific testing done by professionals in all the area - neurologist, psychologist, etc., not just a family doctor. There are neuro and chemical reasons that would show up if he truly had ADHD.

Good for you for not putting him on medication without having all the information. The Dr. Phil show uses a Dr. Lawless as a resource on this topic, and he has a fairly new book out on the topic - sorry, I don't have the name. Check the tv website or google the dr.'s name.

Something like Ritalin is just "speed" - and given to kids when it hasn't actually been tested or approved for children.

Until you have further testing, etc. done for your son, you must work with the school to ensure he is not causing problems at school. And it is a myth that sugar causes hyperactivitity. Your son is exactly at an age where boys go through this - they are more squirmy, restless, etc. All of this has nothing to do with intelligence. You need to get him to a school psychologist to have further academic testing done to see if he is indeed gifted (actually not many schools use that term any more), then they could help plan for them. Where I live, they do preliminary testing in grade one, then other testing in grade three - but every school division will be different.

Talk with his teacher(s) to make sure he is challenged enough at school, and not just given work to keep him busy. Be respectful when you talk to the teachers and principal.

At home, there is lots you can do as well. Make sure he is scheduled well - organization is a key to keep him going on task and motivated. Encourage his interests if he is thrilled by a specific subject (space, etc.), and make sure you and your husband are spending time with him as well.

I wish you luck - work hard at keeping him happy and active - in productive ways. If he is not sporty, get him involved in something outside of school and home - anything at all, any classes, etc.

Enjoy his spark and spunk and encourage him. He is who he is and you don't want to change him, just to manage the behaviour.

Sorry this is so long, but it's one of my major peeves how things get dealt with...

Answer 13

From your explanation, I would go with what the Dr's have told you. Teachers aren't educated to make a medical diagnosis. Some gifted children are a little hyper. Like you said, it's the must learn attitude they have. A true ADHD child usually has poor grades because they can't keep their attention focused enough to do the assignments. Maybe the teachers are at fault here, they aren't giving your child enough to keep him busy and challenge him enough. I don't see the need to medicate a child like him. They are the ones who need to adapt to him. It wouldn't hurt them to make up a little more work for him, maybe a grade higher than he's used to, just as busy work. Challenge his brilliant mind. Good luck to you.

Answer 14

How rude of his teachers!! It is a teacher's job to do their best with their students and if they don't know how to handle an active child it is time to call it quits! I am a 23 year old first year teacher and in my class I have two "ADHD" students. They are both straight A students who just need to be challenged. I don't know how old your son's teacher is but I find that older teachers (not ALL, but some) are less willing to work with active children, my advice would be to talk to his teachers about giving him more challenges. If his class is doing multiplication, give him harder problems. In writing, give him a more detailed topic. I make my active students my messengers or assistants and they take walks to the office or deliver notes for me.

Answer 15

If your son is hyperactive but doing well in school, he may have ADHD, but it has not affected his performance just yet. I was recently diagnosed with ADHD, I am a very intelligent person but my performance suffered in school because I was frequently bored and my mind would wander so I would make mental mistakes and not do daily homework. I have always been a bit socially hyperactive, but I was never considered as hyper as your son (from your description). I think it is very important to note his age. I had straight A's until 8th grade, and then in 9th grade school kind of caught up with me and I couldn't ace everything from just my basic knowledge. You should monitor your son's performance, and encourage good study habits. If he begins to drop off, then you should seek some sort of medication. However, if his social life is hurt by his ADHD, for example an agressive, competitive behavior, bad decision maker, inability to listen or follow directions... then also seek some sort of medication.

I think the prescribed medicine would be adderall if his education is affected. Adderrall is very good at balancing, I found that I was more in control of my behavior and more relaxed. I always had trouble reading quickly because I found myself reading the same line over and over, now I am able to read without allowing distraction. Lastly, busy work, which had been extremely uninteresting, is still very uninteresting but now I don't mind doing it, I think it is because the medicine allows me to realize its purpose and the result of the task.



Edit to say- I talked to my mom about my behavior in elementary school. I also had the learning bug, but unfortunately a lot of times it was on topics much more complex than what the class was learning, and it created a problem for the teachers to be able to satiate my learning needs without going over the heads of all the other students. My school's solution was to give me separate or additional assignments and I ended up spending a lot of time in the back of the class doing various other assignments. Another thing they did was put me in these special "Creative Thinking" classes, where they got a group of 4 or 5 students together to focus on a task that was not normally suited for their age group. This ranged from dissections, entrepeneuring (we created the school store), and some advanced computer and math workshops. See if your school offers these kind of solutions and maybe your son will react positively if he is placed in one.

Answer 16

I truely think ADHD is over diagnosed. I would change his diet first. Lots of fruit, veggies, whole grains, lean protein, and water. I believe there a lot of kids that are hyped up on sugar and/or may have a sensitivity to preservatives or dyes in processed foods. Then I would have a talk with his teacher(s) and the principal. The teacher(s) is/are WAY out of line for her comments. He definately needs a different teacher and maybe different school.

See how he changes with just nutritional changes..........you should notice a good change.............calmer and more focused.

Answer 17

i am a teacher and a parent of a diagnosed ADD child. A child can be ADHD and gifted, it's called a twice exceptional student. your child needs behavior modification as well as placement into gifted classes. He may even excel in one subject and lack in others. i would NOT go into medication right away. force your school to make the proper changes and see how things go. be very involved in his IEP meetings, they will disuss his goals and behavior modifications, once established the teachers are lawfully obligated to follow it. Good Luck and God Bless!

Answer 18

i can't believe they gave him nickname like that!!!



i don't believe in ADHD. frankly, if it wasn't around when i was a kid, then "screw them...." it doesn't exist!!!

i think it's a crock. i mean, when he is at home you get tired from having him jump off the walls, right?? but you get through it b/c you know that he's just hyper and excited about life.



see, i just think that we have this idea of how kids are supposed to act and behave and i just don't buy it. kind of like autism. sure, there are probably cases of autism out there that wouldn't have been realized a few years ago, however, i think autism is turning into the ADHD. it's ridiculous.

we are getting so lazy that we are happy to label our kids with some kind of disorder so we have an excuse for not parenting, or teaching!!!



take care of your son, be a good mom (which i'm sure you are), teach him and love him and kick his teachers in the butt!

if their only reasoning that he's ADHD is b/c he is hyper, then they need to go back to child development class!

also, they need to get rid of the nickname. that's just plain messed up.



take care:)

Answer 19

My 12 year old is ADHD and he is on medicine. But.... he grades aren't bad but they aren't great. Before he was put on the meds, he had horrible grades. When he doesn't take his meds he is awful, bad attitude, his way or no way. When he takes it, it helps him to calm down and think about what he says and does. If your child behaves for the most part and has good grades, then it doesn't sound like he needs meds. If I were you, just keep an eye out for the changes. If he starts acting up and so on, consider putting him on something.

Answer 20

People need to stop labeling over active normal boys with ADD or ADHD, they are little boys and they naturally act like animals sometimes. You teach them and discipline them accordingly and they will grow up to be perfectly fine. You can't over stimulate boys, they go nuts, like teaching them how to read at 4 years old is over stimulating.

My son has a teacher now that is trying to say my son has it because she doesn't want to do her job and control him at school.

Answer 21

Its all up to you, but I am in the same boat as you. My 7 yr old is HIGHLY active but one of the smartes kids in his class. The schools all say he needs medication, and I refuse to put him on it. The Dr. said he is just active, but his learning skills are above average! I also went through this with one of my daughters, and she grew out of it. I dont believe in medicating my child this early in life. Give him time to grow out of it. Teachers today dont want to have to deal with challenging students. So they encourage parents to put them on medicine. Which is what they are doing to you. Stick with you gut feeling, because I have seen kids on the ADHD medicine, and they tend to look like little zombies!! If his behavior is some what okay, lethim be, he will grow out of it!!

Answer 22

I really don't think the teacher should be calling your son names. My son is very smart for his age(he is 7) He gets angry and bored very easily in a class room setting. He goes to special Ed for behavior issues for an hour in the beginning and ending of his school day , then he goes to advanced classes the rest of the day. I believe children believe and act out what they are told. Maybe it is time to move him to another teacher that doesn't call him names!

Answer 23

Throwing Learning into Disorder



“In schools throughout the nation, children who are having problems with their academic work, their peers, their teachers, or their families are being labeled by the users of DSM as suffering from disorders that carry labels like Oppositional Defiant Disorder, Conduct Disorder, or Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. These children may be placed in special classes, dismissed from school, or given medication. From prisons to child welfare agencies, DSM is shaping how we think about problems and determining who gets labeled as having a mental disorder.”

Professors Herb Kutchins & Stuart A. Kirk

Authors, Making Us Crazy, and DSM: The Psychiatric Bible and The Creation of Mental Disorders





In 1952, the American Psychiatric Association published its first Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM), containing a list of 112 mental disorders. DSM-II, published in 1968, consisted of 163 disorders.



In 1980, the third edition, DSM-III, added 112 disorders, bringing the total to 224. Under the lucrative heading of “Infancy, Childhood, and Adolescence,” 32 new mental disorders were added, including:



Attention Deficit Disorder

Developmental Reading Disorder

Developmental Arithmetic Disorder

Developmental Language Disorder

Developmental Writing Disorder

Developmental Articulation Disorder

Serious Reading Disorder

Written Expression Disorder

Mathematics Disorder

Spelling Disorder

Dr. Fred A. Baughman, Jr., has discovered and described real diseases. Finding no abnormality—no sign of disease—in children said to have ADD/ADHD and “learning disabilities,” he writes of them as “inventions, contrivances and fraud.”



Dr. Thomas Szasz, Professor of Psychiatry Emeritus, says, “The conventional definition of child psychiatry is that it is a medical specialty devoted to the diagnosis, treatment, and prevention of mental diseases that afflict children. From a sociological viewpoint, child psychiatry is a secular institution for regulating domestic relations. From my point of view, it is a form of child abuse.”

Answer 24

Teachers are not qualified to diagnose a disorder. They should be fired. ADHD takes a series of tests by a professional to diagnose.

Answer 25

Absolutely possible. It's called being "twice exceptional" or "2E" in many circles.



I'll try to get back to this after I go pick up my KG girl.....but check out the link below!

Answer 26

If he has ADHD then he would probably be struggling in school.