Should I allow my daughter to...?

Question

I have a 7 year old daughter who is very social, and never wants to stay home, she wants to go go go. She has a close friend that lives near by, she wants to spend allot of time over thier, and it is ok with her friends mother. But I still feel uncomfortable letting her spends so much time over thier, but when I make her stay home I feel guilty too. Am I being a paranoid and over -protective mother, or am I right to limit her time away from home?

Answer 1

If your feeling are worry then make sure you follow your gut!



However, if you just feel like the other mother has her all the time and maybe they should be at your house more, then don't worry, maybe pack some snacks for her to share, or something such as that to help ease the load of the other mother.



It is good that she is a social butterfly, out going people tend to do allot better in life. And be proud that your daughter is secure. You never know you may be raising the next little Miss America or the first female president so don't turn her social skills off.

Answer 2

You are the mother. At some point, you have to realize that. Stop letting a SEVEN YEAR OLD manipulate you into feeling bad for making responsible choices.



Honestly, if I were the other child's mother, I'd start questioning how good of a parent you were. Now, don't get huffy, I'm not saying you are a bad parent. I'm just looking at it from the other mom's p.o.v. If she is having your child over for dinner almost every night, if your child is sleeping over several times a week...consider how that looks to other parents. It would seem like you don't really want the responsibility of being a parent, and you will gladly let someone else do it for you.



Try setting limits. Let your daughter go over there one night, have the child come to your home one night, and arrange monthly sleep-overs.



If you are having trouble setting limits when she is 7, imagine when she is 17.

Answer 3

This is so weird, I have the exact same problem with my 7 old daughter. From the time she wakes up in the morning until she goes to bed at night she always wants to be anywhere but at her house. I think she would live at her friends house across the street if I let. Although she has a million toys at home she says she is always bored! It is so frustrating and I know exactly how you feel! Although you got some really good answers, it's always harder to go through with them than it seems. Good Luck, I need it too,lol.

Answer 4

lol I'm 25 and I'm the exact same way... well kind of.. I just like to be going all the time.. Maybe allow for this to happen but explain to her that maybe 1 hour a day she needs to "quiet time" just to herself and then maybe 1/2 an hour a day to have family time.. I can understand how you feel the way you do... I'm sure you're feeling somewhat replaced by this other family???



Don't sweat it! Kids always think other families are more fun then their own... Maybe if you could spend just some one on one time with her once a week doing something cool maybe that would help ease your anxities about her never wanting to be home and would help her realize that no matter how many friends she's got to hang out with you'll always make time to hang out as well!

Answer 5

Honey you are doing better then Iam. My 7 year old ask all the time to stay the night at a friends house. My answer is when I meet everyone that lives in the house hole. If you watch the news, I think we have the right to be protected. You are a good mother. Good for you!

Answer 6

You are not over protective- you are cautious. Nothing wrong with that.



I would ensure that you always walked your daughter to and from her friends home until she is old enough to do this on her own.



I would also insist that your daughter bring her friends over to your home as well. If you have good snacks, the kids will always want to come there. Let the girls have fun, do not get in their space etc. You may find that you daughter will want to me social with her friends in your home, thus allowing you to see what is going on, and not worry so much.



You as a parent are never wrong when it comes to your child. If you feel time away is to much - then it is.

Answer 7

My daughter who is now 11 was the same way.She still is some what. But what I did is I went with her and my son(who is now 6)over there one day and spent the day with her and the girls mother.Me and her friends mom just talk all day. We became good friends and started to spend alot of time with each other at her house, my house or just going out with the kids. We all seemed to enjoy it because my daughter was with me more and she still got to be with her friend. They still hang out almost every day. But they know they still have there rules. They can not go play until there homework is done and checked by me and they have there room cleaned. My kids also know that when the street lights come on its time to go home. Things will work out just you see.

Answer 8

Dont stress, it sounds like you only want the best for your daughter. Maybe next time she goes over to her friends house, walk there with her & talk to the friends mother about it. Say that you were thinking the girls could spend some time at your house as well as hers. Like one day both girls spend it at your house then the next they spend it at the friends house. Also see if the girls mother has a problem with them spending so much time together. Try not to seem to worried about it tho.

Answer 9

At 7 I don't think they need to spend a lot of time away from home. You might just try getting her to invite her friend to your house more often. You shouldn't feel guilty about wanting her at home more. They are going to be gone enough when they become teenagers!

Answer 10

Don't feel guilty about limiting your daughters time away from home. When you do have her stay home, try to set aside some time for you and her to do something together, play a board game, make a scrapbook, anything. By limiting her time away you will teach her that family time is important too.

Answer 11

You need to trust your neighbors with your child. Girls who are 7 through 9 like to go, go, go. I once had gf who had a daughter, like that. She liked to do her chores, but only if a one of her friends helped her do it. She liked to be with her school friends and went to each friend's party- some times even stayed a at least a night or two with them. She liked to play card games and other games, such as Monopoly Jr or even chess. Nice kid, I wanted to adopt her.

Let me know, if you have questions about her.

Answer 12

trust your mothers instinct. your daughter doesnt have it so she doesnt understand but from the moment you gave birth to her you had it. so use your best judgement and dont feel guilty. YOU are the mommy not her. Instead of her going to her friends ask your daughter if shed like to invite her friend for a sleepover.That way you dont come across stearn, you show her that your are flexible. Hope I've helped. Good luck

Answer 13

Have your daughter's friend over to your house sometimes. That way you can have your daughter home more but she also gets to play with her friend.

Answer 14

You could call her friend's mom,and set up some "play dates" so that your daughter could spend time being at home when it's your turn to be the "hostess".

Answer 15

Don't flip on her just know that she needs time with her family and you need to help with the filling her time while she is with you because she is young and she is interested in alot of diferent things in her life right now. So don't be too strict just be strict enough!

Answer 16

i think your very right to give her a limit. but you might wanna ask why she likes it there so much. maybe you find out the reason. so you can make sure she likes it at home as much as over there.

Answer 17

I think you should limit her time to time.

I think they should spend some time together in your house, for a change...

Answer 18

cHILDREN NEED LIMITS,, BUT THEY ALSO NEED TO MAKE THEIR OWN DECISIIONS AS WELL. i USUALLY LIMIT THE TIME MY CHILD SPENDS AWAY FROM HOME SHE NEES TO KNOW THAT SHE HAS A RESPONSIBILITY TO HER FAMILY.

Answer 19

?